Amongst all these groups, there's one thing they each have to grapple with and it's the strongest recurring theme in the film. How much is one life is worth weighed against the needs of zillions? (I know that's not a number, but when someone gets me an accurate census of the universe, I'll change it).
It starts early on when Thanos employs the timeless villain trick of threatening Thor to pressure Loki into giving up the Tesseract (i.e. the Space Stone). It's worth noting that Loki has no real leverage over Thanos. He tries to play it cool, and even sicks the Hulk on him, but eventually caves and gives up the cube. Thanos then kills him and everyone left on board (no sign of Valkyrie, but that's another story) with Thor narrowly surviving. At first glance, this seems very paint by numbers establishment of villainy. Thanos is evil because he threatens lives to get what he wants, then kills people anyway. But as the film goes on, it actually goes a little deeper than that.
The next to face such a choice is Peter "Starlord" Quill. His lover, Gamora, asks him to kill her rather than let her be captured by Thanos, since she knows the location of the Soul Stone. He reluctantly agrees. Gamora tries to protect him from that choice by killing Thanos first, an act that nearly breaks her. Like her adopted father will do later in the film, she chooses to end a life rather risk many more dying. Unfortunately, it is only an illusion. Once Thanos gets a hold of her, it's Quill's turn as he agonizes over his promise he made. With some urging from Thanos, he force himself to point his gun at her and pull the trigger. Once again, Thanos is a step ahead and blocks the attack, but the fact that Quill showed the resolve to kill his lover to save the universe earns a small admiration from the Mad Titan, who comments, "I like him," before teleporting away to the next moral quagmire.
With death no longer an option for her, Gamora resolves to deny her father the Soul stone, but her will doesn't last. She's brought before her sister, Nebula, and watches as Thanos pulls her apart. It doesn't take Gamora long to give up the coordinates. Having already experienced killing someone she once loved for a greater cause, its possible she can't bear to do it again.
But when she and Thanos arrives on Vormir, the shoe goes on the other foot. They learn that the only way to gain the Soul Stone is to sacrifice a loved one. It's with a heavy heart, but no hesitation, that Thanos complies, showing more resolve and commitment to his cause than the heroes show for theirs.
The next one to face the decision is Doctor Strange, keeper of the Time Stone. After swearing to protect the stone at the expense of everyone else's life, he suddenly breaks when Thanos has Iron Man under the knife. He gives up the stone and for once, Thanos doesn't bite him in the hand for the weakness.
The last one to face the choice is Wanda. She and Vision had been wrestling with how to keep the Mind Stone out of Thanos' clutches, but by the end, there's only one option. With the other stones in his possession, there's no one that Wanda can pass the buck to. She makes the hard choice and destroys the stone and Vision along with it. Her reaction echoes Gamora's, Quill's and even Thanos' as they made the same call. The Titan even shows sympathy for the final time as he admires the personal sacrifice she made. But its all for naught. With Time Stone, he can undo her actions and take the Mind Stone, completing his mad scheme.
By the end of the film, the trope of threatening one life to coerce another seems a little tired, but it's use is ultimately significant for answering what is the value of an individual's life, especially when determining how that value balances a greater good. For the Avengers and their associates, the greater good is simple: all life is precious and no one life is worth ending for the benefit of others. As Cap says, "We don't trade lives." There's kind of an unspoken end to that sentiment. "We don't trade lives. We fight for them." Every one of the Avengers and the Wakandan warriors were willing to lay down their lives to give Vision a chance at living his. As Okoye says "It will be the noblest end in history."
For Thanos, things are a little different. The universe is overpopulated and this causes suffering for all. Some must be removed for the benefit of the others. This is why, no matter how hard is, he never has any hesitation about ending someone's life who gets in his way. He knows most of the universe doesn't share his ideal, and that allows him exploit weakness quickly and easily.
Since the Avengers are the heroes we want to succeed, the audience is told that their ideal is the better of the two, but rather than trying to clumsily lecture the audience like The Last Jedi did, Infinity War shows a grander pattern of action/consequence. Notice that all the heroes who let go of the "life is precious" ideal to stop Thanos (Gamora, Quill, Wanda, and Thor who flat out tries to murder him) all fail. Despite their failings, it does seem that their approach is the better choice since they only fail through bad luck. But there's one detail missing from that equation.
With the exception of Thanos, all the characters who faced "the choice" was killed by Thanos, regardless of what they chose. It's a subtle way of indicating everyone dies, what's important is how they lived. Doctor Strange's cryptic last words may hold the validation of this lesson hidden in the film's open ending.
"There was no other way."
There's a fan theory going around that Dr. Strange knew exactly what he was doing when he gave up the Time Stone as he had looked ahead to see all the possible outcomes to find the ONE timeline in which Thanos is defeated. While we don't know the 14 million possibilities he saw, if we assume the theory is true, then the lesson is the ONLY way to defeat evil is to not become it. Even if it means laying down your life and who knows how many others. A hero cannot defeat evil by trying to beat evil at its own game. A hero has to show a better way, or else there will be nothing left to win.
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